Monday, December 9, 2013

Children's parties...but not as I know them

As Phil is away for two and a half weeks in the US and UK (only one week to go now!), I have spent my weekends pootling around in Mumbai.  The weekend before last was relatively cultural, including a Bollywood film and tour ("photo trail") of one of Mumbai's original fishing villages with Phil's work colleagues who were visiting for a few days.  Unfortunately, my camera refused to save any pictures, rendering blogging about a photo trail rather pointless without any actual photos, but I will write about that once I've sourced some photos from elsewhere.

This weekend was more western in style, including a couple of long swims (I'm getting quite into my swimming now), meeting up with friends for breakfast, inviting another friend round for dinner, and going to the cinema to see the new Hunger Games film.  I'm not usually into big blockbuster action flicks, but the HG series is well done and has got a bit more to it (IMHO).  Plus I was craving a couple of hours in a normal, air-conditioned, western environment, and a trip to the cinema to see an English language film seemed like it would do the trick.

I thoroughly enjoyed the film but the cinema trip was an experience in itself.  I'd chosen to go to a big multiplex which looked much smarter than the previous cinemas I'd visited in India (the ticket price was a whopping £2.20) and, as expected, the entrance was gleeming and American-style, with the obligatory security gates and bag search to get in.  Anyway, it turns out that the 1330 showing of the Hunger Games in a wealthy area of Mumbai on a Saturday afternoon is a magnet for rich Indian teenagers who are incredibly noisy and have very little if any concern for anyone else trying to watch the film.  It was amazing.  Whole groups of wild youths were having openly loud conversations and there seemed to some kind of verbal mating ritual going on between groups of boys and girls at opposite ends of the cinema.  Some of the adults were even better behaved, standing up and turning round to shout to the teenagers to "shut the f*** up" regularly throughout the film!  It was bizarre, but also quite fun, and any on-screen kisses or attractive top-less men (watch the film, you'll know who I mean...) met with cheers, wolf-whistles and enthusiastic rounds of applause from the audience.  There is some irony that the higher the class of cinema, the less well-behaved the audience...

Getting to the point, in the first half of the film (there is always an interval, when the film cuts off mid-sentence in non-Indian films!) I noticed a lot of noise from a couple of rows behind me.  As soon as the lights came on at the interval, it transpired that there were at least 40 pre-teenagers there to attend the same birthday party.  In military style, several cinema employees marched out into the theatre carrying trays piled high with burgers, chips, popcorn and sugary drinks.  It wasn't even lunchtime!  The party attendees piled in indiscriminately, seemingly trying to grab as much food as possible.  It was carnage-like and manners were non-existent.  A few stray chips landed on my head throughout this feeding frenzy.  A quick look around showed that these children were covered in designer brands and, to be blunt, most of them could have done with eating fewer chips rather than stuffing themselves.  Given how many people struggle to have enough money to buy food in India, these children were starkly at the opposite end of the spectrum.  The aftermath of this feast seemed to be an awful lot of half-eaten and wasted food lying around. I had a nice chat with a Chinese tourist in the next seat who seemed just as bemused as me.  I used to have birthday trips to the cinema as a children, but I'm sure that this used to involve five to six friends maximum, sharing a box of wine gums and a Happy Meal afterwards if we were well behaved.

My second birthday party experience of the weekend was, unexpectedly, at 5 o'clock on Sunday when I went for my late afternoon swim.  Sunday afternoon is a great time to go as the pool is invariably empty.  Yesterday afternoon was no exception, but with a little more poolside activity than normal. 

The club staff (around ten people) were decorating the pool-wide area for a princess party, but this was like no princess party that I've ever seen.  Pink and white balloons were strung everywhere, across the roof, up the walls, and in arches making a walkway round the pool.  In my 45 minute swim, I did an audit of the number of balloons and counted between 700 and 800 on the ceiling and walls alone, with many more in the arches.  I really really wish that I'd had my camera but unfortunately a camera is not part of my typical swimming kit.

At least 15 six-foot high 2D cut-outs of Disney princesses (Belle, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White etc.) were fixed to the wall round the edge of the pool, but the crowning glory was suspended over one end of the water.  I joke not, someone had made a castle facade, including turretts, a entrance way, windows and a balcony and suspended this over the pool.  This six metre wide, two metre high monstrosity was strewn with fresh flowers, fairy lights and more balloons.  What's more, to swim my usual lengths, I had to effectively swim up the drawbridge, through the moat and into the entrance way, hoping that boiling oil wasn't part of the set-up.  Knowing how Indian health and safety is non-existent, I was a little nervous about the possibility of a castle-collapse to begin with, but I'd come for my swim and I was going to have my swim, and that was that.  At least the swim helped to build up my appetite, partly from the exercise and partly from the piles of food being brought out to a groaning table awaiting the guests.

On the way out of the club, children were beginning to arrive, to run the gauntlet of three separate photographers with massive cameras positioned between the front door and the party pool.  For me, a young child's birthday party involved a vigorous game of musical bumps, pass the parcel and stuffing yourself on ice-gems and cheese and pineapple on sticks until you felt a bit queasy.  I'm sure that parties like this must happen in the UK but I personally haven't seen anything on this scale.

I may sound like a grouch ("In MY day.....etc") and I don't mean to be, I'm up for people having a great day out with friends on their birthdays, but there is something about everything I've seen this weekend which jars against the backdrop of the lives of so many other Indians.  From what I've seen, if you are rich, then more is more.  If you've got it, then flaunt it, with flash clothes, jewellery, car and, apparently, children.  Expat parents I've spoken to tell me that parties are a statement symbol - everyone in the class is invited, no expense is spared and there is a culture of giving the other children a "gift" to take away, which can be pretty valuable (iphone speaker, for example).  What happened to penny sweets and party bags?!  I don't know if it's to do be with being British or something else in my values, but sometimes less is most definitely more in my view, and I'm not coping too well with the splash-the-cash-on-frivolous-things mentality.

Saying that, would I turn down an invitation to a fancy bash?  Probably not.  It's up to others what they spend their money on, but if I ever construct a moat for a birthday party then somebody please bring me to my senses.

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